Thursday, May 9, 2013

Pleasure and Pain Become One and the Same


I was thinking this afternoon about what kind of sex I want to have tonight. I kept swaying between the urge to be choked, spanked, and fucked hard and a desire for tender candlelit lovemaking. Truly, they both still sound incredible right now (with only a couple of hours to go 'til bedtime!).
I absolutely love sexual pleasure. There are few things that can compare with the rush of a particularly strong orgasm. I love the way my body tingles and cries out for more when I'm being caressed, kissed, or tenderly held by my dear Master.

And yet, for me, there is so much additional pleasure to be had in the experience of pain. If I'm in the right mindset, I can take quite a bit of it! Occasionally, incidental pain such as sitting down in short shorts on a hot leather car seat will send a little thrill through me.

But what I'm really getting at here is sexual pain. My ass, nipples, neck, back, even my inner thighs can be deliciously devilish targets for my Master's sadistic whims. If the mood is right, I will eventually lose myself in the sensations of a set of stinging spankings, the licks and bites of a flogger's tails, or the firey intensity of a caning or cropping. When I start to float into subspace, the pain morphs into real pleasure. It's as though, whether I'm bent over Master's knee or having an orgasm at his mercy, the feelings of pain and pleasure are nearly the same! Endorphins course through me and all I can do is smile, cry out, even giggle sometimes. The intensity of pain mixed with sexual excitement truly does create an altered state of mind.
Coming down from this kind of high can be pretty intense, too. But as long as I have a nice, warm place to snuggle with Master afterward, then it's generally a very sweet and gentle comedown. I've noticed that I do get very cold after a trip into subspace. After doing a scene at a BDSM club one night, we went back outside to our car in 80 degree weather and I was shivering!

That place where pain and pleasure meet and merge is downright magical for me. I would describe it as a sense of freedom, of surrender to sensations beyond my control. I love knowing that my Master has that power over me. The power to take my body and mind to a level I couldn't possibly find alone. It's especially magical that we get to take that trip together. I always feel incredibly connected to him after a session where I've hit subspace.

Subspace certianly does not happen for me every single time we incorporate impact play and pain into our evening. And there is still excitement and pleasure to be found in it, whether or not I enter an altered mindstate. Oh, but few things can quite compare with hitting that perfect stride.... "magical" is the best way to describe it.

No comments: